I'm a freelancer, a do-it-yourselfer, and a husband... er. And sometimes, my lives blend. Here's a great story and a great example of what to do the next time someone important—a spouse or a customer—start to complain.

What Happened

"Why are you doing it like that?" 

I looked up from my spot on the floor, measuring tape and boards extended at a forty-five degree angle. 

"Well . . . why not?" was the most I could muster in response.

We had decided to replace the carpet in the entry way and on through the dining room with hardwood floors. Less cleaning, fewer stains, and a quicker clean-up made a hardwood floor appealing; medium walnut wood, a hard coat gloss, and one layer of stain made our house, in a word, gorgeous. It was a pricier move than we would have normally made, but we couldn't pass up the opportunity to get a California home improvement loan—and if the economy doesn't pick back up, well, the new floor will help us sell before the next guy.

But in all the looking and shopping and discussing, we somehow failed to discuss the direction of the wood.

"Who have you ever seen put in a hardwood floor at an angle?" My wife asked. She wasn't perturbed; she was just perplexed.

"My parents."

"Right. Who else?" Ok, maybe she was perturbed, but I couldn't blame her. A crying newborn and sleep at hour-and-a-half intervals is enough to make anyone more than slightly annoyed. A pounding hammer and a pound head do not a happy wife make.

"No one. That's why I'm doing it." I paused, carefully considering my next move. "I thought I'd try to give you something unique. Something special. I'm sorry if it's making too much noise."

"Oh, it's fine," she said quickly. "I really like it that way, now that I look at it. Good idea, babe."

What Really Happened

And it hit me as I popped another chalk line that my exchange with my wife was a tactic popular in my work as a copywriter and marketer. I hadn't planned to use it, and no one taught me to do it, but as you can see it works like a charm.

"Why are you doing it like that?" = This is code for "I'm annoyed, and I don't know why." 

Businesses and spouses—women and men alike—often encounter this one. Someone is upset, and you become the scapegoat. 

"Well . . . why not?" = This translates into "That's a dumb question."

It might be a dumb question, but that's not the point. Your client/spouse/interlocutor wants attention, and you are shooing them away like a fly at a picnic.

"Who has ever done it that way?" = A really good second chance.

You don't always get this. Some customers will walk right out the door, some affiliates will start bashing you, and some spouses will walk away crying. None of these is a particularly desirable result, and you just won a second chance. Don't blow it. If you attention is what they need, then give them some attention. So answer their tweet, send a personal email (not a form letter), give them a call, or give them a freebie.  Give them something. It's what they need.

"Something unique. Something special." = Know your audience, and give them what they need.

At that particular moment, I had been slaving away at the floor for the better part of a Saturday, and my wife—my beleaguered, spit-up drenched wife—needed some acknowledgement. Customers sometimes need to know that you really have them in mind. For the vast majority of the cases, the difference between a one-star rating and a five-star rating is whether or not they perceived you heard them and did something about it.

What Can Happen

You'll keep a wife happy, a customer in your business, and food on your table. What's not to love? Leave us a comment about when your DIY project went horribly wrong, and what you did to make the spouse happy.

Jared Heath is a freelance writer who will do just about anything to make his wife happy. From floors to stories, Jared loves to put things together.